http://www.manosydedos.com/index_sel_fingers.html
Screw realistic, I’d rather have a creepy looking claw that could crush a human skull. Or maybe one with quick disconnect tools for any occasion: like one minute its a human skull crushing claw, the next minute its a human skull melting plasma cutter.
http://newmedia.funnyjunk.com/pictures/prices-of-different-liquids.jpg
Where in the hell is bull semen represented on this graph?
http://www.muttscomics.com/art/images/daily/042808.gif
Although I appreciate the spirit of this comic, who wants a dog that sounds retarded when it tries to bark? I don’t mean that, I mean to say… like a… half-wit.
Then when he leaves the room, my friends’ll ask me “Hey whats up with the dog, is he like developmentally disabled or something?” And I’d have to explain “No, no, he’s cool, he just sounds like that because he’s got this inner ear problem, and he can’t hear”
Then they’d feel kind of bad and not want to visit anymore. Partly because of becoming aware of their own prejudices, but mostly because they’d be uncomfortable when I talk about the dog like he can’t hear me even though he’s sitting right there.
Eventually we’d have a falling out and they’ll break into my house and steal my mint condition collection of Todd McFarlane action figures. And they’d get away with it too, because my freaking watch dog is DEAF!
I’m sorry, I’m an animal lover, but I don’t need that kind of drama up in here.
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/d18007b1b7
Waitaminit, what? THIS is what makes O’Reilly an asshole? In my book, this actually improves his image a little bit. Before I saw this, I figured Billy was such a galvanized ultra-douche, that he’d actually superseded the need for actual genuine human emotions… Like a cyborg built by the reptile overseers (or maybe even a double-cyborg) I’m a little disappointed in him now. It turns out he’s a human after all. Not some cyborg simply following it’s douchey programing. But a man. A stupid evil little man, who’s a douche for his own stupid evil little reasons.
http://s3.amazonaws.com/0SAJ7JN5VFAWT249NNR2.anigifdel/9ad207c2b1664be319a6c3ec1b97f5fd
And despite all of the best efforts of the Earth’s scientists and engineers to approach lower friction engines and bearings… the formula of synthetic midget sweat continues to elude them all…
http://www.nkuas.org/getoverit/archive4.html
Either these are some wimpy regrets, or I hit rock bottom a long time ago and I’ve been waaaay too drunk to notice…
*hic*
In addition to instructing mankind how to build the pyramids, I believe the “visitors” may have also relayed to us their techniques for quilting…
Can you imagine how warm a homemade space quilt is?
I bet its pretty toasty…
http://www.toptenz.net/top-ten-comic-book-villains.php
How lame. Luthor #1? Doomsday? Kingpin? Give me a break. 
Bask in Luthor’s lameness!
Next!
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1810056
He waited for traffic to go by. What a pussy. You know that if this guy was American, he would have wiped out and been hit by a car and we would have gotten to see his femur snap like a stale breadstick.
Still pretty awesome. Even if it doesn’t contain any patented American stupidity.
$20 here. $3 dollars everywhere else in the world.
Kind of neat, but ultimately high prices for “fresh off the boat” drugstore fashion shades from 1986. I gave the site the old “collage try” but at length I had to leave because I started to develop a sort of slow-burning rage from the endless pictures of that pretentious wispy-bearded scarf-wearing dork. It was like it triggered a genetic memory or something and suddenly I realized I was BORN to hate this guy’s smug expressionless face.
What a fucking twat.
Next!
http://www.darkroastedblend.com/2008/05/anteater-coolness.html
Yeah… Real cute until you find out the hard way that the human hypothalamus gland smells just like ants.
SARACANITE 
