Modern Mechanix

http://blog.modernmechanix.com/

This is a brilliant site. This is hubris city. Oh why did we ever stop developing technology in the vein of brute force? The finesse of today’s “information age” does not impress me. I’m sorry but a Tomahawk missile is not as cool as a cannon that will fire a projectile the size of a small car some 40 miles. Oh! Give me the days of missing fingers and botulism! Of steam powered machines with nicknames like “widow-maker” and “mangler”.

marroe.net

http://mark.marroe.net/index.php?showimage=30

So even if the show was pretentious and lame, the elephant puppet is still dripping with awesomeness. If I were a billionaire I would so totally have a fleet of these baby’s to terrorize the world with. Real ones and 50 feet high! Powered by furnaces that burn crushed bodies for fuel! And the trunk would spray a poisonous mist when it wasn’t being used to batter buildings and vehicles with uprooted telephone poles. I’ll be playing a massive pipe organ deep within the plushly decorated belly of my mightiest elephant. And all the worlds leaders would have an emergency meeting over how to stop my seemingly invincible army of iron juggernauts before I destroy all of the worlds most beloved landmarks… but they wont be able to stop me… not without the other half of this amulet! Ha Ha HAHAHAHAHA HA!

http://www.beerhunter.com/

Michael Jackson. Not the pedophile Michael Jackson, the ALCOHOLIC Michael Jackson. Very interesting site even if it promotes beer snobbery. No mention of Pabst Blue Ribbon.
Hey true story, but the other day I was in line at the grocery store and the guy behind me felt compelled to talk to a complete stranger (me) when he saw the beer I was buying was Pabst Blue Ribbon. He’s like “Hey man is that PBR? That stuff is awful!” then he flashed me with a smile that was missing a few teeth. I’m not usually very well equipped to deal with strange men who criticize my beer when I’m preforming the mentally taxing giving-the-cashier-exact-change task. My brain was all like “Say something, stupid!”, so I said “well I usually buy Natty but when I see this I always get it because it’s totally worth the extra 30 cents” and then he wistfully says “Yeah I must have drank a thousand cans of that when I was a kid…. CHEAP BEER!” Then he started laughing and I’m not usually a violent person but I was confused with notions of braining this guy. Withing a few seconds he managed to belittle my beer, and somehow, my manliness. And worse yet, his very talking to me was insulting because obviously he looks at me and feels like he can talk to me without being reproached. Like we’re instant buddies for drinking the same beer. I mean if you could see this guy…
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us OK that wasn’t really him but just to give you an Idea of where on fugly-ometer this dude registered. I walked away very angry with myself for somehow allowing a link between this A-hole and myself. At length I recovered but I have taken a solemn vow to stop drinking PBR the moment a tooth falls out of my head.