http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Constipated

Named for the lovely town of Bristol! So which one are you? I must confess, I usually have a case of the ol’ Type 2’s. I only ever get a Type 4 after drinking alot of Budweiser. But I don’t drink Budweiser very often, only when I’m at some lame ass place that only carries Budweiser and something even worse… like Heineken or Becks or something. Of coarse, that isn’t why I don’t drink it… neither is the taste…. I think it tastes just fine… it’s the headache that I get from it, thats the reason I don’t drink it. There is no other beer that can give me a headache like Budweiser. Oh sure, Guiness will lay me up… the next day, but Bud will give me a headache while I’m still drinking it. It’s like a brain-tumor in a bottle. Anyone who says Budweiser is the best isn’t drinking enough of it to get drunk. Pussies.
Wanna get yourself a case of the Type 1s? Get smashed, I mean blacked-out-pissing-on-the-coffee-table smashed. Then as soon as you wake up (hopefully before noon) start drinking whiskey, and keep going strong until you finally keel over. If you vomit, you have to start all over again. Now when you wake up drink some coffee with some whiskey in it to wake you up and keep you on that razor edge. By the time you crap it should be Type 1s. If you didn’t party hard enough, you aren’t dehydrated enough for Type 1s and the last of your fluids will evacuate themselves as some Type 7s. Don’t worry though, you’ll still get them Type 1s the next day. Also by this time your crap (whatever type it is) will smell like roofing tar, and your urine will smell like kidney tears.